I recently moved out of the apartment I had stayed in for two years. It was a sudden move, but also one I had quietly been expecting. Not necessarily because I was ready, but because I knew, deep down, that the time would come.

And it came faster than I thought.

This wasn’t my first time moving. I’ve moved quite a bit in the past few years, and honestly, I usually prefer to stay in a home for at least five years before changing. I like stability, peace, and knowing I can settle in fully. But life doesn’t always give us ideal situations. Sometimes you have to move before you’re fully ready, and that was the case with this apartment, just like the one before it.

The difference is this: this last apartment wasn’t just a place I stayed. It was the place that held me while I healed.

The Apartment That Saw Me Break and Rise Again

I moved into that apartment after leaving a toxic relationship. I didn’t have the luxury of time or too many choices. I just needed a place—quickly. And somehow, God made a way.

That apartment wasn’t perfect. It was too close to the road, it got noisy, and over time, water started getting into the walls. But it gave me what I needed at that time: safety, privacy, and space to start over.

Those walls witnessed some of my lowest moments. They heard the silent tears, the angry phone calls, the painful regrets, the confusing numbness, and the heavy loneliness that followed my decision to leave. But they also saw my strength build up, day by day. They saw me find myself again. They saw me slowly walk out of fear, shame, and guilt, and into courage, boldness, and peace.

They saw me laugh again. Dream again. Believe again.

So yes, even though the apartment had become physically uncomfortable to live in—the mold, the water, the noise—emotionally, it was hard to leave. Because that house had been part of my healing. That space held a version of me I had fought so hard to rebuild.

And moving out felt like closing the chapter on a very personal season of my life.

How to Emotionally Prepare for a Big Move From a Place That Held Your Healing

If you’re about to move out of a space that has been with you through tough, defining seasons, here are a few things I’ve learned through experience:

1. Acknowledge the Role That Space Played in Your Life

It’s okay to feel sad or heavy, even when you know it’s time to move. Just because you’re leaving doesn’t mean you’re ungrateful. Take a moment to acknowledge what that place gave you.

Say thank you to the walls, the rooms, the quiet, the chaos, the view, the comfort. Thank it for what it carried you through. Gratitude helps you to leave in peace.

2. Grieve the Goodbye—It’s Not Just a House, It’s a Part of Your Story

You’re not just moving from a building. You’re moving from memories. From growth. From pain. From healing. Let yourself feel it.

It’s okay to cry while packing. To sit on the floor and remember. To walk through each room and whisper goodbye. Moving on doesn’t mean forgetting—it means honoring what was and allowing space for what’s next.

3. Understand That Healing Happens in Seasons—and So Do Spaces

Some spaces are meant for certain seasons. They serve their purpose and prepare you for what’s next. But when that season shifts, the space may no longer match the version of you that’s emerging.

That’s how I knew it was time. The moldy walls, the road noise, the restless sleep—it no longer aligned with the peace I now carried inside. The space had become too small for the woman I was becoming.

4. Let the Move Symbolize Your Growth

Instead of only seeing the move as a loss, try to see it as a symbol. A symbol that you’ve grown. That you’re moving forward. That you’re not the same version of yourself who moved in.

You’re stronger now. Wiser. More in tune with what you need and what you no longer want to tolerate. Your move is a reflection of that.

5. Take One Last Moment to Reflect Before You Leave

Before leaving, I stood quietly in that apartment. I didn’t rush. I let the silence speak. I remembered where I had come from. I felt the weight of everything I had survived.

I said goodbye, not just to the walls, but to the version of myself who had once lived there—the hurt girl, the scared girl, the one who cried and doubted and fought. I honored her.

Then I walked out with confidence. Because she brought me this far.

Moving Isn’t Just About a New Address

It’s about closing one chapter and opening another. It’s about being brave enough to walk away from what no longer fits you, even if it once saved you. And it’s about trusting that what’s ahead will be even better.

If you’re standing on the edge of a move like this—emotional, sudden, maybe even overwhelming—I want you to know: it’s okay to feel everything. But also know, you’re moving forward. You’re not who you were when you moved in. And that, in itself, is something to be proud of.

You deserve a space that reflects your peace, your growth, and the future you’re stepping into.
Let go with love. Move forward with grace.

As a result, I didn't see myself moving this year. But the discomfort in that apartment increased more than ever before a few days before I left.

In fact, at the beginning of May, the thought hadn’t even crossed my mind. But just a few weeks later, I found myself packing up boxes, cleaning out rooms, and stepping into a new apartment—and a new season of life.

I may have desired to move because I didn't intend to stay there for long but I ended up leaving because the discomfort had built up for a while and I couldn't manage the situation anymore. 

The signs had been building up quietly but like many of us, I tried to manage, cope, and adjust. Until I couldn’t anymore. In this post, I want to share what led me to finally make the decision to move, and some signs that might help you know when it’s time to do the same.

How I Knew It Was Time to Move: Signs That Told Me “This Isn’t It Anymore”

1. When Discomfort Becomes Normal

The apartment I just moved out of wasn’t bad. It was generally good, I loved the colours of the paint on the walls which were painted mostly white and a touch of peach and green. it had two toilets of good sizes. The kitchen was small but not that bad and it had a balcony as well. It being close to the road made it close to the shops where I could buy things easily even at late hours. It actually came into my life at a very critical moment, right after I left a toxic relationship. I didn’t have much time or many options back then, so when I found it, I was relieved and grateful. It gave me peace and privacy when I needed it the most.

But from the very beginning, there were things I wasn’t fully comfortable with. The location, for one, it was too close to a noisy main road. And while I love lively areas, this one wasn’t quite the residential kind of “lively” I enjoy. Over time, the noise got tiring. 

I also started noticing the walls were damp, especially when it rained. The building wasn’t fully finished, and water started seeping in. I didn’t realise how much it affected me until I started dreading the rainy season. That’s not how home should feel. 

2. When You Start Making Excuses for the Place

There were times I found myself justifying the problems:
“Oh, it's not that bad.”
“At least there'll be no problem during the dry season.”

But deep down, I knew I wasn’t at ease. I knew I was forcing comfort in a space that was slowly becoming unhealthy, physically and mentally. Mold started to grow. The air felt damp. The house was colder. worried about opened windows when it rained because more water was getting in. It was exhausting.

If you find yourself constantly making excuses for where you live, it might be time to really ask, "Do I still feel good here?"

3. When You’re No Longer Growing in the Space

Some places are meant for a season. That apartment helped me heal, regain stability, and restart my life after a difficult relationship. But once that season passed, I started feeling stuck. I outgrew the space.

Home should support your growth. It should feel like a safe space, not a place you’re tolerating. If your environment is no longer helping you thrive or reflect who you’re becoming, that’s another sign it may be time to move on.

4. When Your Body Starts Telling You Before Your Mind Does

Before I even made the decision to move, I noticed I felt drained at home. Tired. Heavy. Like I couldn’t fully relax. The wet walls, the noise, the lack of privacy with shops in the compound—it all started weighing on me.

Sometimes, your body speaks before your mind fully catches up. Pay attention to how you feel in your space. Do you feel at peace? Energized? Or do you feel stressed and restless? Those feelings matter.

5. When God Opens a Door, Walk Through It

When I finally accepted that I needed to move, everything happened quickly. It was already mid-May when I seriously started looking, and by the end of the month, I was in my new place. I thank God because it all came together after the few days of stress while preparing for this move.

Even while filming this cleaning video for my YouTube channel, I didn’t know it was part of preparing me for the move. Sometimes, God nudges us softly through our actions before we realise what’s happening. If a door opens and it feels right—even if it’s fast—don’t be afraid to walk through it.

A New Chapter That Feels Right

Now that I’m in my new apartment, the difference is clear. It’s quieter. I have more privacy. I wake up to birds singing, not cars honking. The view is calming, and I feel a sense of peace I didn’t realize I had been missing. This is what home should feel like.

If You’re Wondering If It’s Time to Move…

Here are a few questions to ask yourself:

• Am I still comfortable in this space, or just coping?

• Do I feel safe and relaxed in my home?

• Is my living space affecting my health, physically or emotionally?

• Am I making excuses to stay, even though I know it’s time to go?

• If I could move today, would I?

Moving isn’t always easy. It comes with stress, uncertainty, and expense. But sometimes, it’s the most necessary step you can take for your well-being.

You deserve a home that supports your peace, growth, and healing, not just one that “will do for now.”

Blogging Used to Be So Different… and I Miss That

Once upon a time, blogging was simply about sharing life—what we were thinking, learning, wearing, cooking, or feeling.

No performance. No pressure. Just realness. 

We wrote like we were writing letters to friends. People connected because they felt us.
And that’s what I want to bring back. 

Why I Shifted... and Why I'm Coming Back

Just like everyone, there was a time I felt the need to be very relevant.

To focus only on topics that I believed would help ambitious African women (like myself) feel empowered, especially mentally. And truthfully? That season gave me purpose.

But now, I want to return to the heart of why I started blogging—to share life as I live it.
Not just the advice, but the everyday beauty, lessons, softness, creativity, and becoming.

I still remain a strong advocate for women’s empowerment.
But instead of only teaching, I want to live my message—and invite you to walk with me.

What to Expect Here Now

This space will now feel more like a cozy journal than a classroom.

Here’s what you’ll find:

• 🌸 Soft reflections and daily musings from my everyday life

• 🧺 Lifestyle content — what I eat, wear, grow, and how I live like a woman who is becoming

• 💭 Life lessons as they unfold in real time

• 📚 Occasional useful guides or resources for those who still need the how-tos

• 💛 Stories and updates from my journey of rebuilding a more intentional, fulfilling life

This Space Is For You If… 

You’re a woman starting over.

Or maybe you’re slowing down.

Or simply trying to live well while raising kids and rebuilding dreams.

If you want softness, inspiration, honesty, and friendship…
You’ll feel right at home here. ☕

I’m no longer just sharing advice—I’m sharing my journey of life.
And I hope it helps you feel seen, less alone, and inspired to grow gently too.

If you’ve been here before, thank you.
If you’re new, welcome.

I can’t wait to journey with you and enjoy the feel of a bloggy blog again 😊.

With warmth,
Ngumabi

Backstory: A Refuge When I Needed It Most

When I moved into my last apartment two years ago, it was more than just a place to stay—it was my refuge. I had just walked away from a toxic relationship, and I needed somewhere safe and available quickly. That apartment came through for me when I had little time, limited options, and a mind that needed healing. For that, I’ll always be grateful.

At the time, I told myself I’d stay there for a year and then find a better space. But life happened, and a year became two.

Why I Had to Move (Again)

While the apartment served me well emotionally, physically, it came with its challenges. Its location—close to a busy road—meant constant noise, and the building itself wasn’t fully completed. Over time, water began seeping into the walls, especially during the rainy season. Mold became a serious issue, and I knew it would only get worse.

At the start of May, I had no plans to move. But by mid-May, I was actively looking for a new place. The realization hit me hard—there was no way I could spend another rainy season dealing with wet walls and mold. I prayed, searched, and thankfully, things fell into place much faster than I expected.

My new view

The Hassle of Moving—And the Help I Received

Like most moves, this one was stressful. Sorting, packing, cleaning—it’s a whole workout. But I’m incredibly thankful for the helpful hands that made it easier. Though I paid for the help, I felt truly supported. These kinds of transitions are never solo efforts, and I’m glad I wasn’t alone.

What I Love About My New Apartment

Living room view

I absolutely love the new place. It’s quieter, calmer, and far enough from the road that I can actually hear birds sing in the morning. The view is beautiful, and the privacy is unmatched—no shops in the compound this time, just peace.

Funny enough, while recording a YouTube video of myself cleaning the kitchen (still thinking it was just my usual cleaning day), I had no idea it was actually part of the moving process. Looking back, I realize even that was a subconscious preparation for change.

Grateful for New Beginnings

I’m grateful for how everything turned out. Even though the move came unexpectedly, I know it was the right decision. This apartment feels like the next chapter, one I’m excited to live in, grow in, and create beautiful memories in.

I'll be sharing more about moving in Yaoundé in the coming days, so stay tuned for more. 

#ᴍᴀʏᴅᴜᴍᴘ 

Happy month of June ❤️

1. My room had a little makeover - giving Pinterest vibes

2. Changed the position of my dining table to a position I appreciate better but never tried because I felt it won't work.

3. Took drinking water seriously

4. Baked my best banana cake yet (as seen on YouTube @NgumAbi)

5. Used Sivoderm after a long time  6. Before I gave my kitchen a makeover  7. After the makeover  8. New logo for my business @ngumishop which is a merge of my kids shop and my handmade shop 9. Out and about for a film screening event at Mboa Hub 10. Moving houses

11. Loving the configuration of the new living room

12. New plant leaves

The Importance of Financial Freedom and Legacy: Why Women Must Create Their Own Paths

I believe every woman deserves the chance to live life on her own terms. It’s not just about financial freedom — it’s about having the ability to create the life you want and leaving a legacy that makes a difference. As someone who has walked this journey of building businesses and striving for independence, I know how vital it is to have the freedom to make choices that align with your passions and purpose.

Why Financial Freedom Matters

For so long, the narrative has been that a woman's worth is tied to her relationship with others, whether it’s being a good wife, a caring mother, or fulfilling traditional roles. But what if we shifted that narrative? What if we started talking about how important it is for women to own their lives, to be the driving force behind their own success, and to carve out paths that are uniquely their own?

Financial freedom is one of the most empowering things any woman can have. It gives you the freedom to make decisions without being constrained by financial obligations. It allows you to live fully, to provide for your family, to invest in your passions, and to protect yourself from situations where you're vulnerable due to financial dependence. I’ve always believed that independence is a woman’s greatest strength. It's not just about the ability to spend money — it’s about the power to control your destiny.

How It All Ties to Creating a Legacy

The concept of legacy has always been close to my heart. I don’t just want to build a business; I want to create something that stands the test of time — something that my children can look back on and say, "My mom built this. This is what she worked for, and this is the foundation she laid for us."

Creating a legacy goes beyond financial success; it’s about creating impact for your family, your community, and the world. My goal is to leave a mark that outlives me.

We often talk about leaving something behind for our kids, but legacy isn’t just about inheritance. It’s about teaching them the values of self-determination, creativity, and purpose. It’s about showing them that they can dream big and have the freedom to achieve their goals without limitations. The freedom I’ve been working so hard to achieve isn’t just for me — it’s for them, too. I want to set them up with the mindset and resources they need to never feel stuck, to always have a way forward, and to build their own paths when the time comes.

Why Women Must Create Their Own Paths

The world is changing, and women no longer need to wait for permission or validation to pursue their goals. Too often, we’re told to play small — to focus on what’s comfortable and familiar. But I’ve realized that the most fulfilling journeys come from stepping outside of that comfort zone, from creating something new, and from taking the reins of our own futures.

Creating your own path isn’t easy. Trust me, I’ve faced plenty of challenges in building my brand and businesses. From finances to the constant juggle of motherhood, there’s always something trying to pull me away from my goals. But the key to pushing through those obstacles has been purpose. I keep my eyes on why I’m doing this — for my children, for the women I aim to inspire, and for the legacy I want to leave behind.

Women should feel empowered to chase their dreams, whether it’s by starting a business, creating content, or finding ways to serve others. There’s no one-size-fits-all journey, but the core of it is the same: building a life where you have the freedom to make decisions that align with your values, your passions, and your ambitions.

Taking Action: How You Can Start Today

You don’t need to have it all figured out to start working towards financial freedom and creating a legacy. Here are a few steps that can help you begin:

1. Start with Your Why: Understand why you want to create this legacy. What do you want to leave behind? What drives you every day? Start with that clear vision, and use it as your compass.

2. Invest in Your Skills: Knowledge is power. The more you learn, the more you can create. Whether it's through education, online courses, or just researching your field, invest in yourself and your skills. This is what will enable you to build a sustainable future.

3. Set Financial Goals: Financial independence doesn’t happen overnight. Set clear, actionable goals. Start saving, investing, and building the foundation for your future. Having control over your finances will unlock so many doors.

4. Build a Support Network: Surround yourself with people who believe in your mission, especially those who’ve already walked the path. Community and mentorship are crucial when you're carving your own path.

5. Take Action: Dreams are just ideas until you take the first step. Whether it’s starting your own business, creating content, or just figuring out your next move, do something every day that brings you closer to your vision.

It's Time to Build Your Path

The path to financial freedom and building a lasting legacy is not always easy, but it’s worth it. Every small step you take brings you closer to the life you desire — the freedom to live on your terms, the ability to provide for yourself and your family, and the chance to leave a meaningful impact. I’m building my path, and I encourage you to start building yours. You are worthy of creating the life you’ve always dreamed of.

Remember: Your future is in your hands. Create your path and leave a legacy that empowers others to do the same.

As someone who works from home, it’s all too easy to blur the lines between work and rest. I used to keep going even on weekends—emails, projects, strategy—but recently, I’ve been learning to pause. To intentionally choose rest.

So I gave myself permission to have a slow, no-work Saturday.

My Best Banana Cake Yet & A Slow, No-Work Saturday

🌿 Starting the Day Slowly

The morning started as quietly as I hoped. I made up the bed and took a deep breath, grateful for a peaceful home and the soft rhythm of a day with no pressure.

Before heading to the kitchen, I checked in on my plants—something that always brings me joy. I noticed their new leaves had grown some more. Little things like that feel like magic when you're paying attention.

💚

💚

🧁 The Star of the Day: Banana Cake Bliss

Now, let’s talk about the highlight of my day—my banana cake.
Baking has become one of my favourite weekend hobbies. It’s simple, grounding, and deeply comforting. There’s something about mixing ingredients, pouring them into a tin, and watching it all rise into something warm and delicious that makes me feel like everything is going to be okay.

And this time? The cake came out perfect.

Fluffy, golden brown, and proud—no sinking, no cracking. I felt so proud watching it sit beautifully in the pan. I did a little happy dance inside.

Because I’m doing intermittent fasting, I had to drink some water and hold off before cutting it. But oh, it was worth the wait. I sliced it, served some to my kids, and tucked the rest away for my first meal of the day.

😍😍😍

😋😋😋

Took drinking water very seriously during intermittent fasting

🧖🏽‍♀️ A Little Home and Self-Care Doesn’t Hurt

After baking, I did some organising in my room and gave myself a bit of pampering.
I did a mini spa bath with my body scrub and sea salt, then treated my face with Sivoderm pomade - my current go-to for that soft glow. These little rituals are a reminder that rest isn’t just about sleep, it’s about treating yourself with care.

View before organizing and cleaning this side of my room

After

It all started with a desire to clean just my shoe rack, then I reorganised the whole side of the room

I used Sivoderm pomade to treat my face after all the organising. The review of this product is still up on the blog here (click here)

🎬 Cake, Movie, and Soft Living

To end the day, I curled up to watch a Nollywood movie on YouTube and finally broke my fast with a generous slice of that banana cake.

It was the kind of day that reminded me how much joy there is in simplicity. In baking without pressure. In letting a Saturday be soft, slow, and sweet.

Watch the vlog of the day on YouTube

💛 If You’re Reading This…

Let this be your reminder that you deserve rest too. That soft hustle is valid. That slow day still count.

My Banana Cake Adventures: A Hobby That’s Becoming a Lifestyle

There’s something so comforting about baking — the mixing, the waiting, the sweet aroma filling up the house. Lately, baking banana cakes has become a weekend ritual for me, and honestly, I’m loving every bit of it. I didn't expect to enjoy it this much since I've never baked and thought baking was so difficult. 

It all started with a simple desire to try baking at home for fun. I already had a banana cake recipe here on the blog — one I recorded while my grandmother was baking. Watching her make it so effortlessly made me want to try it myself. But as you can imagine, things didn’t go smoothly at first. 😅

Related: Easy Way to Bake a Fluffy Banana Cake All by Yourself

My first cake. It burned! It was so flat that it sank

This second cake was quite delicious, though. It would have been the best cake if it were fluffy

My second cake was heavier, but I improved by not burning it as much.

The first two cakes I baked were... well, not the best. They rose beautifully while baking, but sank right back down once they cooled. I was confused at first until I realised I had only been using baking powder, not adding bicarbonate of soda. So, on my third try, I added bicarbonate too — and guess what? The cake came out fluffy and soft. That was a big victory!

😍😋

The winning cake! I felt so proud that it was a success!

Since then, I’ve been tweaking the recipe, experimenting with measurements, and trying to make slightly bigger cakes. Sometimes they come out softer, sometimes they rise beautifully, and sometimes they fall flat again. Just the other day, I tried baking with only bicarbonate — like my grandma used to — but it sank again. I suspect the batter was too soft this time around.

This is my most recent cake, where I used just bicarbonate. It later fell like it never rose. It didn't burn at all or stick to the pan like some others; I'm proud of that.

This cake sank later. I was still experimenting, making a bigger cake

This cake was a success, too, though I almost missed getting it right because I wanted to make a bigger cake again

Still, each attempt is teaching me something new. I now know how to regulate the fire so the cake doesn’t burn. I’ve learned how to properly grease or line the baking pan so it doesn’t stick. My last cake didn’t burn or stick at all, which felt like progress!

One of the biggest wins for me, though, has been figuring out how to bake using a pot on my gas cooker. I used to think it wasn’t possible — or at least that I wouldn’t know how to do it right. But I tried it, and it worked! And now that I know how, nothing is stopping me from baking whenever I want.

My kids are always excited when I bake, even if the cake isn’t as fluffy as I hoped. As long as it tastes good, they’re happy — and thankfully, it always does. 😂

It made a delicious breakfast with yoghurt

Baking has slowly become more than just a fun activity. It’s now part of my lifestyle — something I look forward to doing every weekend, something that calms me, teaches me, and gives me little moments of joy (and sweet treats!). I plan to explore other cake recipes too with time, but for now, banana cake is holding a special place in my kitchen and my heart.

So here’s to more weekend baking sessions, more lessons learned, and hopefully, more fluffy banana cakes ahead!

Do you have any hobbies you are into right now? I would love to hear your experience in the comments.