Too often, African women are told to shrink their dreams to fit societal expectations. We hear whispers of doubt—“What will people think?” “Isn’t this too ambitious?” “Focus on finding a husband first.” These words, often said with good intentions, end up discouraging women from chasing their true potential.

Dear ambitious African woman, let me remind you today: your dreams are valid. Not only are they valid, but they are also necessary. The world needs your vision, your brilliance, and your determination to create a lasting impact.

Breaking Stereotypes and Challenging Norms

For far too long, societal norms have tried to box African women into specific roles. We’re often expected to prioritize marriage and motherhood above all else. While these are beautiful and fulfilling paths, they don’t have to define your entire existence.

You can be a loving mother, a devoted partner, and still dream of building a business empire, excelling in academia, or becoming a global leader. You don’t have to choose one over the other; you can carve your own path, one that reflects your unique desires and goals.

Consider the trailblazers who have dared to dream big: women like Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala, who shattered glass ceilings to become the first African woman to lead the World Trade Organization, or Lupita Nyong'o, who rose to global stardom while proudly embracing her African heritage. These women didn’t let stereotypes hold them back. They proved that our dreams are not only valid but achievable.

Why Your Dreams Matter

Your dreams are more than just personal ambitions. They have the power to inspire others, to create opportunities, and to transform communities. When you chase your dreams unapologetically, you pave the way for other women and girls to do the same. You become a beacon of hope, proving that it’s possible to dream big and achieve greatness.

Think of the generations of young girls who will look up to you and see a reflection of what’s possible. By pursuing your dreams, you’re not just creating a better future for yourself—you’re also breaking barriers for others to follow.

Steps to Embrace and Protect Your Dreams

1. Believe in Yourself: The first step to embracing your dreams is to believe that you are worthy of them. Drown out the voices of doubt and negativity with affirmations of self-confidence.

2. Define Your Vision: Get clear about what you want to achieve. Write down your goals and visualize your success. A clear vision will guide your steps and keep you focused.

3. Seek Support: Surround yourself with people who uplift and encourage you. Find mentors, join networks, and build relationships with like-minded individuals who share your drive.

4. Stay Resilient: The journey to achieving your dreams won’t always be smooth. You’ll face challenges, setbacks, and moments of self-doubt. But remember, every setback is an opportunity to learn and grow stronger.

5. Set Boundaries: Protect your dreams from negativity. Distance yourself from people or situations that undermine your confidence or make you question your worth. Your dreams deserve a positive and nurturing environment.

6. Take Action: Dreams without action remain wishes. Start small if you must, but start. Every step forward brings you closer to your goal.

The Courage to Dream Big

Dear ambitious African woman, you have the courage and the strength to dream big. Your dreams are not too wild or too far-fetched. They are a reflection of your unique purpose and potential. Don’t let fear, societal norms, or self-doubt dim your light.

Embrace your dreams with boldness. Protect them with resilience. Pursue them with passion. And always remember: your dreams are valid, and you are capable of achieving them. The world is waiting for your impact. Go ahead and make it.

The Beginning of My Blogging Journey

The Struggles: Motherhood and a Toxic Relationship

Reconnecting With My Passion

The Vision: Building My Dream Life

Embracing the Journey

Happy New Year, Amazing Ladies! 

Hello and welcome to 2025! 🎉

I hope you had a wonderful holiday season filled with joy, love, and rest. A brand-new year is here, and I couldn’t be more excited to start this journey with you.

First, let me say a big thank you for being here, for reading, supporting, and growing with me over the years. Your encouragement keeps me going, and I’m so grateful to have you as part of this community.

2025 feels like a fresh page—a chance to dream bigger, achieve more, and truly step into the amazing lives we’re creating for ourselves. This year, my goal is to inspire and support you even more as we work toward building impactful, fulfilling lives.

If you’re new here, welcome! This is a space for ambitious women—women who want more out of life than just being mothers, wives, or women. We are dreamers, doers, and legacy builders, carving out our own paths and resetting the records.

Here’s What to Expect This Year

This year on the blog, I’ll be sharing step-by-step guides and stories to help you achieve your goals, whether it’s starting a new career, growing your business, or simply living with more confidence and joy. Together, we’ll explore how to discover your purpose, build wealth, and create a life you truly love.

There will be practical tips, personal lessons, and plenty of motivation to keep you moving forward. I’ll also be sharing more about my own journey as a blogger, social media manager, and entrepreneur. Let’s grow together!

A Gentle Reminder

As we set big goals for 2025, remember to take it one step at a time. Be kind to yourself, celebrate the small wins, and never stop believing in your potential. This is your year to shine, to take charge, and to turn your dreams into reality.

Let’s make 2025 the year we become the best versions of ourselves! I can’t wait to hear about your plans, wins, and challenges. Leave a comment below and let me know what you’re looking forward to most this year.

Thank you for being part of this amazing community. Let’s make it a fantastic year!

Wishing you love, happiness, and endless success,

Ngumabi

Reflecting on 2024: Lessons from a Year of Growth

2024 has been a year I didn’t anticipate—challenging in ways I could never have predicted. It’s been a journey of struggling with mental health as I healed from a toxic relationship left behind in 2023. It’s been a year of battling weight loss and rediscovering self-love. I also grappled with unmet career expectations. Yet, amidst the disappointment and difficulty, I focused on moving forward—getting things done even when it felt overwhelming.

But as challenging as the year has been, it has also been a year of tremendous growth. The growth that came through hard lessons and deep introspection. Difficult growth, requires me to unlearn old habits and embrace new ways of thinking. Today, I feel immense gratitude for these lessons. They have shaped me and will guide me into the future. Here are some of the most important lessons I’ve learned in 2024:

1. The Power of Deeper Patience

This year, I truly learned what it means to be patient. Not just ordinary patience, but deep patience—the kind that requires you to accept that change will come, but not necessarily when you want it. My patience was tested and stretched beyond limits I didn’t know existed.

Being patient isn’t rosy, especially in uncomfortable situations like healing, growth, or figuring things out. It’s tempting to want quick solutions or instant results, but I learned to embrace the waiting. During this waiting period, I used the time to rethink, reprocess, and reassess. I examined my life and my choices, reshaping them bit by bit. This patience allowed me to focus on shaping the results I wanted, rather than rushing into half-baked solutions. It wasn’t easy, but it was worth it.

2. Sitting with My Thoughts

One of the hardest yet most rewarding lessons I’ve learned this year is the importance of sitting with myself and my thoughts, even when it’s uncomfortable. I used to avoid my thoughts, running from the chaos in my mind. But life’s circumstances pushed me into situations where I had no choice but to face them.

Sitting with my thoughts meant processing them—starting from the chaotic jumble in my head and working through them until they became clear and logical. It was exhausting at times, and I often wanted to escape. However, I realized that ignoring my thoughts only made things worse. When I took the time to sit with them and think things through, I felt a sense of freedom and clarity I hadn’t experienced before. This practice helped me make better decisions and brought me peace in the long run.

3. Tackling the Hard Things First

Another valuable lesson from this year is the importance of doing the hard things first. For a long time, I had a habit of postponing challenging tasks or decisions, hoping for the “right time” to tackle them. However, I learned that delaying hard tasks only made them more complicated and burdensome.

When I started addressing the heavy tasks and decisions first, I felt a sense of relief and accomplishment. Once those were out of the way, everything else felt lighter and more manageable. Tackling the hard things head-on might not be easy, but it’s the best way to move forward.

4. Understanding Healing as a Process

Healing has been a central theme of my year, and I’ve learned that it’s a process—one that’s far from linear. Healing doesn’t mean an absence of pain; in fact, you often feel pain while healing. There are phases where you feel like you’re making progress, only to feel like you’ve gone back to square one. This back-and-forth can be frustrating, but it’s all part of the journey.

Healing is a mixture of emotions. It can be crying, laughing, feeling anger, experiencing resentment, and eventually finding freedom. It’s messy and unpredictable, but the end result is worth it. I’ve learned to give myself grace through the process, knowing that healing takes time.

5. Practicing Self-Care and Self-Love

This year, I’ve learned to care for myself in ways I never did before. Self-care isn’t just about pampering; it’s about how I treat myself, speak to myself, and forgive myself. It’s about giving myself another chance when I make mistakes and loving myself the way I would love someone dear to me.

Self-love has become a cornerstone of my healing journey. I’ve learned to be kinder to myself, to let go of harsh self-criticism, and to celebrate my progress—no matter how small. I’ve embraced the idea that caring for myself is not selfish but necessary for my well-being and growth.

Reflecting on 2024, I see a year that challenged, stretched, and ultimately helped me grow. It was not easy, but the lessons I’ve learned are invaluable. They have prepared me for what lies ahead and have given me tools to navigate life with more patience, resilience, and self-love.

To anyone who has had a difficult year, I hope my reflections inspire you to see the growth in your struggles. Life’s toughest moments often carry the most profound lessons, and it’s through these lessons that we become stronger, wiser, and more aligned with our true selves.

Happy New Year!

My weight loss so far

Reconnecting with my younger version through self grooming

This is how to sweeten Foleré without using sugar 

Ingredients

Method