Today we are talking about levelling up. Who doesn't want to level up their life? 

I'm sharing with you tips for African women to level up their lives and be better women.

Click here to watch my video on this topic

How to level up your life as an African woman

Change your mindset

Your mindset is the key to your levelling up, my dear. If we keep thinking of ourselves as "we belong in the kitchen, to make a home or for marriage" then it will be difficult to upgrade our lives. 

We need a mindset that believes that we deserve better in life, that we can do more and can be more. 

Wanting a home and being a housewife isn't a bad thing but it's not the only thing we can be in life. We can be homemakers and also be entrepreneurs, change-makers or career women. 

Grow and develop your knowledge in order to improve your thinking

So read books to improve your mindset, my dear African ladies. Follow women who are in places or levels you dream of being. Attend meetings and conferences to interact with women who can impact your life positively. Use social media to see what other women are doing, the changes they are bringing to the world. 

This will change and improve your mindset greatly. You need to go out there in search of information to develop yourself. Even from the comfort of your home, you can do so with social media. Do research. Read, listen and interact on the right platforms to improve your thinking.

Discover yourself, your skills, talent or gift.

Self-discovery is the core of succeeding in your projects. You need to know who you are, your worth, and your value. You need to know that you matter and you don't exist by chance. You need to know that you are worthy of being alive, worthy of being here and that as a woman you are worthy. 

You need to understand that your feelings, desires and wishes matter just like that of others. 

After finding yourself find out what natural gift you have. Everyone has a gift. Your gift is the thing you do very well with little effort. Find out what it is and work on it to improve it. 

Next is to find ways to valorize it and share it with others. That way you'll create an impact in your life and in the lives of others.

Believe in yourself

Self believe is crucial in levelling up. You need to believe in your ability to do the things you desire to achieve. You have to believe in your gift or talent. Believe in your strength.

Even at your lowest moments, make efforts to believe in yourself. Believe that you can make it.

Put your competence together and take action

Put together your skills, and self believe and start taking action to level up your life. Action is what will transform your life from what it is to what you want it to be. 

Work hard

After taking action keep working hard till you get there sis. Everyone says work smart but I say you need to work hard first in order to know how to work smart. So work hard to build yourself, your vision, your goals and talent to the level that it becomes a blessing to you.

Be patient

Most of us young African women don't like this word but you can never get anything good in a hurry. If you want lasting success then you have to be patient and allow things to unfold as they should. 

You have to be patient to reap the fruit of you labour as you work hard.

Have patience as you work to achieve your goals and level up your life.

Those are my tips for you African women to level up your lives. 

Click here to watch my video on this topic

Today, I want us to discuss where we need to level up as African men and women when it comes to relationships.

Everyone has flaws or weaknesses for sure. But let's discuss that weakness as a group.

Click here to watch my video on this topic.

Who Needs To Step Up In Relationships? African Men Or African Women?

Romance

African men are not very romantic beings. Only a few of them catch the romance fever. It's true that the number of romantic men is increasing but they are still not so many of them. 

African women are more romantic than African men. They think, eat and drink romance. It begins when they start reading romantic novels and watching romantic movies. They begin to imagine ways to make their relationship romantic.

Lies

I think African men lie more than African women because from the beginning of the relationship most of them tell lies to get these women to date them. And they keep telling these lies to keep being with the lady.

It's true that African women tell lies to men to get money or favours but they are not as much as that of the men.

Cheating

Some people say women cheat more than men but I don't think so. 

We see men cheat more often than women. Even though women can be very secretive, it doesn't mean they cheat more. They are just smooth criminals 🤭 when it comes to cheating and the way they hide what they do makes people think that many other women cheat as well. 

But in my opinion, the men cheat more than the women.

Loyalty

African Women are more loyal in relationships. They go into relationships most times believing that they have found the man of their life only to find out later that he isn't even with them or he isn't thinking about a future with her.

So African women are more loyal in relationships.

Dressing

Let's give it to the ladies and call it a day, ok. The ladies put more effort in their looks and appearance more than the men.

Violence

African men oh, come and take your trophy🏆. African men are more violent physically and emotionally in relationships. 

They feel they have the right to abuse these women and most of them hide under the pretext of being the head of the family and authority which is wrong.

Finance

Another trophy for the men. They are the providers and breadwinners of the relationship most of the time. Women often come in a supporting role. 

After all these points I think that African men need to step up on a number of things. Stop cheating, telling lies, dress better, be more loyal to your woman and stop being violent towards women. 

Click here to watch my video on this topic.

Hope you guys are doing well. 

I'm fine and doing my best to make things happen in my life and my business. I haven't discussed business on the blog but I intend to open up on that more and more from now. I think sharing my struggles as an entrepreneur will help other entrepreneurs out there.

If you read my about page you'll know about my online businesses. I have always been a creative person so I made a business for my own designs, I have always loved thrifting aside from having the gift of thrifting the best so I created a thrift business.

These shops exist on Instagram, Facebook and on the website Ngumis where I share updates of products and arrivals.

In Search Of New Clients At The Start Of The Year

Finding clients has not been easy this January. With everyone complaining of January being a difficult month, it's either you have clients that pay so low or can't afford it at all.

It feels discouraging I must confess especially for my ready to wear business because I'm just starting out. So I ask myself if it will work or if it is worth it. 

But I still feel determined to keep pushing until it works. The business that has been doing ok so far is the thrift business, especially the baby items. I understand it's because kids' needs don't really have a season and can be bought at anytime it is needed.

Right now my focus is to keep striving for more clients and I know it's a matter of time for me to get them. 

Valentine's day is showing its romantic head again. A lot of people, as usual, will be with their lovers, spouses and partners to celebrate. This is a good thing. 

Watch the video I made on this topic by clicking here

For those who care about Valentine's day and want to be with someone but can't, I'm here to tell you that you haven't committed a crime. 

You can spend the day alone and you will survive and come out alive. Some people are currently in search of someone to just spend the day with romantically and they don't care what the relationship will look like after that. 

It's Not A Crime To Spend Valentine's Day Alone

So here are some things you can do with yourself on Valentine's day this year; take yourself out on a date like a lover would do, buy yourself a gift, buy yourself a cake or some flowers, watch a movie at home or go for a spa treatment. 

The aim is to do something to occupy your mind and to be busy also. This will help you not feel sorry for yourself.

I know it can be tough if you have a circle of friends and all of them are with their bea on that day except you. But don't despair or condemn yourself. Just do something nice for yourself and it will make you feel good.

I hope you have a wonderful lover's day this year and wish you all the best if you are searching for love.

I also made a video on this topic so please watch it by clicking here. You'll love it.

I made a series of posts about relaxing my hair and the products I used as well as my feelings of betraying my community for not keeping nappy hair. I hope you guys read those posts but if you didn't then click the following links to read them too.

Relaxing my one-year-old nappy hair

Products I used to relax my hair

Disconnected from my community because my hair is relaxed

Watch the video I made about this by clicking here. 

Once Upon A Time, I Had Nappy Hair | My Transition To Relaxed Hair

I cut my hair very low in December 2019 at the barber's shop and it was almost bald. My reason for doing that was I wasn't taking care of the hair I had. I could blame it on motherhood but other reasons like not being satisfied with the quality of my hair were another major problem. 

I didn't know if I wanted to keep nappy hair right away. As time went on, and my hair started growing, I coloured my hair. It was still very short though and as my hair grew it was cool to have golden brown tips.

So I decided to keep nappy hair. I knew it will not be easy but I wanted to try again. I have had nappy hair for a year in the past so it wasn't new.

Some months into my nappy journey, I started finding it difficult to manage my hair dandruff and I did a few hairstyles that cut my edges. 

That was around the period when Greenlifebate reached out to me and gifted me hair products from her brand to try. I must say they came in time because they actually made me change my mind about wanting to relax my hair. Her products made my hair soft and easy to comb and also spared me all dandruff.

Reviewing hair products from Greenlifebate

So fast-forward to December 2020 when I had thriving nappy hair but I just wanted to do more with my hair. The hairstyles I felt like doing sometimes required that I relax my hair and moreover managing nappy hair took more time and energy. I made the decision to relax my hair.

And so I did. It felt amazing and I was happy. I only felt the guilt of no longer belonging to the nappy family anymore but personally, it made me happy.

That's how I transitioned to relaxed hair and I have no regrets. Nappy hair just like relaxed hair has its pros and cons and so far I am cool with my relaxed hair.

I know that nappy hair represents our identity and self-acceptance. And it feels somehow like a detachment when you are no longer nappy. But as long as the reasons behind relaxing your hair have got nothing to do with you not liking who you are then it's fine.

There's my story. I hope you like this post.

I made a video on this topic where I shed more light on it. Click here to watch.

Sugar-daddy relationships are the reality of our African society today for a number of reasons. Though most people believe that it is just for financial benefits, there are other reasons why young African girls go for sugar daddies.

Let's look at them.

Click here to watch my video on this topic instead.

Why African Girls Go For Sugar Daddies

Money

The obvious reason. As I mentioned earlier, African girls have sugar daddies because they want to get money. But aside from money some of them want other benefits like jobs, networking and other benefits that will give them a better life.

Adventure

Some girls are in it for adventure and discovery as well as the opportunity to learn. These men can take them places and show them things which are fun and interesting so they date them to learn from the experience.

Disappointment from past relationships

When some African girls get a series of disappointments from younger men which they would have loved to marry, they tend to have sugar daddies to forget their disappointments. 

Maturity

Sugar daddies who are much older than these girls are more experienced in life and show a high sense of maturity compared to younger guys and that attracts some girls. This makes it easy for them to date these men as they find them more understanding and tolerant.

So, guys, those are the reasons why most African girls date older men or sugar daddies. These relationships have highs and lows. 

It's a phenomenon which is very much seen as a taboo in our African society even though it is much present. The fact that the girls accept to date these men for money or for some benefit makes it sound so taboo to most people. 

But this judgement is coming from a society which still practices child marriages and these children are being given to very old men to pay or settle debts or to get financial favours from an influential family. 

I made a more elaborate video on this topic. Click here to watch it.

Hope this post meets you well. How are you doing this 2021? We are almost one and a half months into the year and  I was wondering if you have set any goals for the year or if you don't just feel like it?

Click here to watch the video of this post instead. Click here.

I Don't Feel Like Having Goals This Year 2021 | Confession 

I don't feel like setting goals this year. I thought I will be motivated to do so when the year starts but I don't feel like it. I do admire those who have vision boards and mapped out plans for the year but I'm not yet motivated. 

I'm just making plans one week at a time and one month at a time. Last year I had a word for the year (though I didn't focus on it after Covid 19) but this year I seem to have none. I really don't have a theme or vision to look forward to this year. 

The thing is I am not even trying hard to get any goals are written down or a theme for the year right now. It's like I'm still getting used to the idea that I am no longer in 2020. 

Maybe after dealing with the phase I'm in now I will do it but I don't want to put any pressure on myself. 

Don't feel pressured if you are not feeling right about setting goals. We are still struggling to survive this pandemic and that alone is not easy to deal with. 

My advice is to change your goals to very short term goals. Plan the week ahead or just the month ahead.

Also, let your goals focus on you. You don't have to set goals on things that depend on circumstances that you can't control. Let your goals be about things you can actually work on and control like your physical and mental development.

As for me right now I'm just taking 2021 one day at a time and hoping for the best.

Click here to watch the video I made on this topic.

A lot of African women do not know how to package and sell a better or the image that they want to the public.

Here are a few tips to help you do that.

I made a video on this topic so you can watch it on my youtube channel by clicking right here. 

How To Package And Sell Yourself As An African Woman

Prioritize your beauty needs. 

What is important for you when it comes to looking good? Is it your hair, makeup, nails, skin care or wellbeing? Decide which thing about you you prefer or love to stay on fleek all the time so that you can pay more attention to it and invest more in it.

Know your budget 

Know how much you get or how much you are willing to spend for your physical image or look. Allocate more money to the thing you find the most important to you. 

Know where to get good stuff at cheaper prices

You need to consider thrifting or buying second-hand clothes and accessories when you are on a budget in Africa. Your budget may be too small if you want to wear only brand new clothes.

Find out if you can buy really good items from your friends or in the market. Know the markets or spots that are cheaper. 

Know how to mix thrifts with new clothes to make them blend

blending what you wear is an art and you need to learn that. Have a few brand new items and mix them with your thrifts or second-hand outfits or accessories. Just find ways to make them work together and blend to give the impression that they are all brand new.

Reinforce your outfits

Take your brand new or Chinese made shoes to the shoe mender and sew them right after your buy them to give them a longer life. 

Have clothes for special occasions and for other activities

Buy simple slippers and keep them only for special occasions or outings so that it stays new every time you take it out. Separate your outing wears from your home wears or errand wears. This way you always have new things to wear and go out.

Know how to dress for every occasion

Let your dressing be in context. Don't wear clubwear to church for example. Try to dress for the occasion and stand out within that context by using the right accessories.

Have moments where you look simple and be proud of your natural beauty. 

Don't let artificial beauty define you. Looking simple from time to time enables you to build true self-confidence. When you are confident without your makeup, fine clothes and other beauty accessories then you are building stronger confidence.

Work on these points and your image will improve. I hope you enjoyed this post;

Thanks for reading and remember you can still watch the interesting video I made on this topic by clicking right here. You can also subscribe to my Youtube channel by clicking here.

I got this lipstick in December 2020 while I was doing my nails at the salon. The lady doing my nails who is also the owner of the salon recommended I buy it. 

It wasn't a planned purchase at all and I haven't bought a lipstick in a long time.

I've been waiting for the right moment to try it. And I decided to do so and share my thoughts with you.

Trying On My New Purple Lipstick & Review

The product

How did it feel using this lipstick and gloss?

Tips for using it.

Things I love about the lipstick and gloss

Today I want to share with you my wardrobe organization tricks and what my wardrobe looks like on a daily basis. To be honest it may get more disorganised than this but here is how it looks on most days.

If you prefer to watch the video of this wardrobe tour instead then click here to watch.

How I Organise My Wardrobe | Tricks I Use To Make Everything Get Into My Wardrobe

Things found in my wardrobe

Cosmetics

My clothes

My daughter's clothes

Shoes

Bedsheets, towels and blankets

Unused clothes and miscellaneous

My wardrobe tour | Inside the wardrobe of a Cameroonian Lifestyle Blogger

My wardrobe is the type we find in most houses in Cameroon. 

It is divided into two compartments vertically. One side is further separated horizontally into a cupboard. 

The first cupboard of my wardrobe is where I put my cosmetics and jewellery. These things were previously at the foot of my bed and my daughter will not stop going there to scatter them. So putting them at the topmost part of my wardrobe is the best thing to do with them.

It also has my wigs and other little stuff I own.

The last part of the cupboard is for any other things such as blankets, bedsheets, and any other clothes or stuff which I don't use often.

The uppermost part of my wardrobe is where I keep my handbags, mosquito nets and cartons.

I have a few of my handbags hanging on the doors of my wardrobe because I recently used them and felt so lazy to put them back in place.

The other side of the wardrobe is for clothes that stay on hangers. Below that is my box of clothes.

My shoes are found on the wall behind my hanging clothes.

That's how I organize my wardrobe and as you can see it is realistic. It's not perfectly arranged but it is clean and that's how it looks on most days.

You can watch the video of this closet tour below.

Click here to watch the video.