I recently relaxed my one-year-old nappy hair and I felt a conflict within myself because being nappy is not just a choice or a lifestyle. It is an identity. It represents a race and a community. So I must say relaxing my hair after growing it naturally for a year felt like a betrayal. 

That's a heavy word but what I felt was close to that. 

Disconnected From My African Roots Because My Hair Is Relaxed

Nappy hair gives you a sense of belonging

Many of us like to belong somewhere or in some community. We belong to our family when growing up and later we belong to other groups which construct our personality and identity. Being nappy gives that feeling of belonging, identity, pride and personality to those who have it. 

He who is not with us is against us

Since it is a community there are definitely people who feel attacked when you don't align with that lifestyle. And this is not good at all because even though it represents an identity of a community, having relaxed hair doesn't mean renouncing your African roots or identity. It's a matter of intention. 

Though it does make you look different, it all depends on why you do it. As long as the intention is not to change who you are there is no problem with it. 

My journey to relaxed hair

I relaxed my hair recently after keeping it nappy for a year. I love my relaxed hair. It's still my hair whether relaxed or not and I love wearing it simple most of the time. 

Related: My experience with relaxing my one-year-old nappy hair.

                Products I used to relax my hair

While with nappy hair, I knew that at some point I was going to relax. And when the time came I did. 

Read all about my experience of relaxing my hair here.

My take on this

Whether relaxed or nappy it doesn't matter. Do whatever feels convenient for you. Nappy hair is not for everyone; No matter how much some bloggers and YouTubers make it easy to maintain, it's not easy for everyone. It requires more products, time and dedication to care for it.

It's not to discourage you from keeping nappy hair but just to tell you the truth. I enjoyed my nappy journey because it was different and there are hairstyles I could make with it that I can no longer do with my relaxed hair. 

But right now, nappy hair is not for me. I may go back to it in the future or sometime when I feel like keeping it again. there's time for everything and now is the time for relaxed hair. I can always do a big chop and start all over again. I'm happy I am that courageous when it comes to my hair.